[a] paper tiger

. . . aka: yojfo.com

hi, I'm jesse forest.

I live in Boulder,
hang out at Victors & Spoils,
and sometimes rock a six string with the talented Natalie Walker.

I also post photos here
and when a song is stuck in my head, it might wind up here.


Neato.


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  • Metaphor Monday Mayhem!

    I was looking up metaphors and [s]tumbled upon this list from the english-blog archives.  Here are 25 metaphors to spice up your Monday…

    1. Her face was a perfect oval, like a circle that had its two 
    sides gently compressed by a Thigh Master.

    2. His thoughts tumbled in his head, making and breaking alliances 
    like underpants in a dryer without Cling Free.

    3. He spoke with the wisdom that can only come from experience, 
    like a guy who went blind because he looked at a solar eclipse 
    without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it and now goes around 
    the country speaking at high schools about the dangers of looking 
    at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it.

    4. She grew on him like she was a colony of E. coli, and he was 
    room-temperature Canadian beef.

    5. She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog 
    makes just before it throws up.

    6. Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever.

    7. He was as tall as a six-foot, three-inch tree.

    8. The revelation that his marriage of 30 years had disintegrated 
    because of his wife’s infidelity came as a rude shock, like a 
    surcharge at a formerly surcharge-free ATM machine.

    9. The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a 
    bowling ball wouldn’t.

    10. McBride fell 12 stories, hitting the pavement like a Hefty bag 
    filled with vegetable soup.

    11. From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole scene had an 
    eerie, surreal quality, like when you’re on vacation in another 
    city and Jeopardy comes on at 7:00 p.m. instead of 7:30

    12. Her hair glistened in the rain like a nose hair after a sneeze.

    13. The hailstones leaped from the pavement, just like maggots when 
    you fry them in hot grease.

    14. Long separated by cruel fate, the star-crossed lovers raced 
    across the grassy field toward each other like two freight trains, 
    one having left Cleveland at 6:36 p.m. traveling at 55 mph, the 
    other from Topeka at
    4:19 p.m. at a speed of 35 mph.

    15. They lived in a typical suburban neighborhood with picket 
    fences that resembled Nancy Kerrigan’s teeth.

    16. John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds 
    who had also never met.

    17. He fell for her like his heart was a mob informant, and she was 
    the East River.

    18. Even in his last years, Granddad had a mind like a steel trap, 
    only one that had been left out so long, it had rusted shut.

    19. Shots rang out, as shots are wont to do.

    20. The plan was simple, like my brother-in-law Phil. But unlike 
    Phil, this plan just might work.

    21. The young fighter had a hungry look, the kind you get from not 
    eating for a while.

    22. He was as lame as a duck. Not the metaphorical lame duck, 
    either, but a real duck that was actually lame, maybe from stepping 
    on a land mine or something.

    23. The ballerina rose gracefully en Pointe and extended one 
    slender leg behind her, like a dog at a fire hydrant.

    24. It was an American tradition, like fathers chasing kids around 
    with power tools.

    25. He was deeply in love. When she spoke, he thought he heard 
    bells, as if she were a garbage truck backing up.

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